Coming Back

Did you ever have a dream, and then you let it die
Though you didn't know quite how, nor did you know why
Did your heart begin to ache with such emptiness and sorrow
That you felt without your dream there was no hope left for tomorrow
Did you ever meet a friend who understood your pain
Who worked with you and loved you... so you could have it once again
Did you finally catch your star and weren't empty anymore
Did you find out that your dream was more beautiful than before
Did you ever know such joy when you got it back
You could finally see that light and your future wasn't black
Oh for what swells in my heart, but if you only knew
Through love and faith and work, you can make a dream come true

 

Written November 1979
To Bishop Dee A. Hyde, a true friend

Diary of My Baby

My child lie within me now
The news has been confirmed
Words can't describe the feeling
The first time I felt him squirm

It's such a special feeling
To know he's safe inside
My womb is quickly growing
So the news is hard to hide

Each day I tell my baby
Of the things we all will do
'Cause I think my child hears me
And knows we love him too

I know he's leaving heaven
Probably scared to come to earth
So I like to reassure him
He's even loved before his birth

I tell him about his Father
What a happy family we will be
How we'll work together
So we can be eternally

I ask God to bless my baby
That he'll be safe and strong
That his life will be a good one
Happy, honorable, and long

I ask him for his guidance
So we can raise him well
It's such a special mission
So I don't want to fail

Time is getting closer now
The months are passing by
My child grows within me
His time is drawing nigh

He must be very healthy
He can kick just like a mule
Oh he's very, very active
Not a moments ever dull

Finally his time arrived
And as I gave my child birth
I wondered how he was feeling
About coming down to earth

And then I saw my baby
A screaming little boy
Only parents know that feeling
Of indescribable joy

I can't forget the love I felt
When they placed him in my arms
I knew that he was chosen of God
For he had such heavenly charms

I looked into his depending eyes
And at that very time
I felt a shock of responsibility
For his world depended on mine

I realized I had a child of God
That was perfect in every way
It was up to me to guide him
And give love to him each day

It was up to me to feed him
To cuddle and to hold
Then I thought of ugly stories
Of neglection I've been told

Then I looked into those eyes again
There were so dependent on me
I sensed a feeling of helplessness
And then I said to he

You know we'll always love you
Don't ever be afraid
You're here because you're wanted
Our joy is all you've made

So rest your little head on me
As we hold you in our arms
We feel so very blessed to have
A baby with your charms

Don't ever think you're all alone
When you need someone who cares
Just give a little whimper
And your parents will be there

We'll always keep your tummy full
The other end so dry
We'll always feel it an honor
To care for our little guy

We'll teach you about heaven
When its memories are gone
We'll always be your best friends
Whether things go right or wrong

My baby looked up at me
And a radiant gleam filled that child
And even though only hours old
He smiled his first smile

 

Written May 1979
To my little "Itch".  This is his story and it's true.

Enough

   If you love your community enough to get involved
If you love your neighbors enough to lend a helping hand when one is needed
   If you love your friends enough to be blind to their shortcomings
If you love your family enough to live so that you can be eternally reunited
   If you love yourself enough to work devotingly at developing your talents
If you love the gospel enough to sacrifice for its building up
   If you love God enough to respect and obey his commandments
Then without words you have told Jesus that his work has not in vain,
   For you do remember and love him

Written March 1980
 

Mt Brother's Keeper

The other night I had a dream, and dreamt that I had died
And when the veil was lifted I saw my brother to my side
His eyes were red and tearful, he was shaking with such pain
So I asked my little brother if I could comfort him

He looked to me and asked "Why do you bother now?"
It was when I dwelled on earth that I had needed thou
The memories of my past suddenly pained me deeper
A mission I had failed by not being my brother's keeper

And then I almost said "But I had so much to do
Besides I didn't think it was my place to bother you"
Instead I begged "Oh please! Give me one more chance
To help you my dear brother, to change life's painful glance"

I felt a spark of hope knowing that he needed love
The kind that comes from families, from friends, and from above
It was then that I awoke, and was glad it was a dream
But I knew within my heart what this had to mean

I do not want to face him, not like I did before
And I cannot bear to see him in sorrow anymore
So I pray that all his loved ones will kindly work together
So that my precious brother can be happy and forever

Written Easter 1980

An account of a dream and a very special experience.

Alone

Did you ever find you were all alone
   Found all your hopes and freedoms gone
Hurting so bad you stumble and cry
   Down so low you want to die
Did you come to find you were born to lose
    Standing at the crossroads, which way should I choose

Written Senior Year of High School
With love and understanding to those who are lost and feel alone as I once was.

Losing Love

If a memory can make you smile
can make you cry just like a child
If you feel the things you used to feel
and the feeling you feel is truly real
Then you will know the love you had
will come back someday to make you glad
So wipe away your bitter tears
and forget about your foolish fears
For if your love was meant to be
it will be yours for eternity

Written Sophomore Year of High School
To young love.

Always

I'll always love you, yes I'll always care
When times get rough, I'll always be there
Promise no crying, promise no tears
For hard times make stronger true love through the years

Sometimes life's sorrows make life's pathway a trial
But you've made me happy, yes you've made me smile
May God bless you Darling, for what you've give so rare
For I know when I need you, you'll always be there

Written Valentines Day 1980
To Paul, we've been through so much together.

A Time

A time for learning
to love, to share
To say I do
to always care
A time for dreams
to finally come true
A time for that happiness
only shared by two

Written Summer 1978
To Paul on our wedding day.  I wrote this the summer we were married, at a baseball game no less.

Searching

To find love always pray
cry at night, search each day
Look everywhere, scan every heart
but be strong 'cause love can hurt

And when you find your love is true
and is you find he loaves you too
Make him happy, stand by his side
'cause if you don't your love can die

 

Written 9th Grade
The second poem I wrote.  How I felt about love.

My Gift

Las night you said you loved me
   and you told me how you felt
How I had made you happy
   that my smile could make you melt
My heart was light and beaming
  and I felt so good inside
Until you asked for something
   which was mine to guard with pride
You wanted to more than kiss me
  but it was your love to show
How could you be so selfish
   to try and cut me low
My gift is pure and priceless
   and is only mine to give
If you had truly loved me
   you wouldn't of asked for it
So now I know what love is
  and how you lied to me
Thank God I didn't give it
  how unhappy I would be

Written 9th Grade
The first poem I wrote and I wrote it for someone else.

Just Do It!

Break a bad habit
Learn something new
No goal is too high
If it makes a better you

Don't put your potential
Away on a shelf
Your greatest obstacle
Is probably yourself

Written New Years 1980
To everyone

The Coward

A closed mind has no courage
It doesn't dare to change
It can't slide down God's rainbows
Nor dance in falling rain
It will never learn identity
Or catch a falling star
A closed mind is a coward
And never will go far

Written Senior Year of High School
A kind of comfort to people who dare to be different.

The Briar Rose

Within my Father's garden wall
   a thousand flowers grew
With fragrances so sweet and pure
   and perfectness of  hue
One day my Father beckoned me
   and bid me enter in
Before he shut the garden gate
   with love his voice began
"My child this day choose ye a seed
   use wisdom in thy choice
And I will plant it in your heart
   to harvest and rejoice."
I walked upon his garden path
   searching out my flower
Understanding each bud offered fruit
   knowing each one's sacred power
Deep down inside my spirit knew
   reluctantly is chose
With pain I plucked a thorny stem
   for I love the briar rose
Its petals embraced his charity
   each bud would promise spring
Although its stem proved painful
   it stood for all my dreams
Slowly I turned to my Father
   met with his approving nod
Then he shut the gate behind me,
   he placed my hand upon the rod
Upon my journeys path I met
   the sores upon my hand
And with the gate shut tight behind
   I could not understand
At times I filled with bitterness
   then hung my head to cry
With festered pain unbearable
   I questioned him on high
Many times I fell in agony
   but each time I met my foes
Somehow my heart would pick me up
   for it held the briar rose
And when at last I fell to broke
   and feared it was my end
A gentle wind swept through my heart
   it was my garden friend
With tearstained face he picked me up
   and in my heart did sew
The seed of pains grandest fruit
   A humbled heart can grow
The garden gate seems far behind
   the road ahead too long
Can one expect this mortal hand
   to hold with memory gone?
One does not know which foes they'll meet
   what heartaches they await
But if one wants to walk with God
   praise to the garden gate
For my keeper cultivates my heart
   a place his spirit grows
For when thy thorns are held with love
  behold thy briar rose

Society's Child

Look at me, see what they've made
Pasted, molded, hand engraved
Like clay molding hearts and minds
Teaching of prejudice, being so blind
Make me happy, now make me sad
Drive into me deeper, drive 'til I'm mad
No matter... what's inside can see
Superior I look down and scoff at thee
Happiness is rare if not all lost
If you don't be yourself, you'll pay the cost

Written Junior Year of High School
This poem is very important to me.  My hopes with it are that people who find themselves in a crowd that feels they are superior to everyone else, and has a set code of friends and even their carbon copy personalities, will have the guts to say I don't need this!  Because I'm a person with a separate identity and I have enough courage to accept others who may be different than me.

Revolution

Today I sat beside a brook
It was rushing on its way
Not caring where it came from
Not knowing night from day
He rushed ore the rocks and pebbles
Thus wearing away their shape
So foolish was this brook
He laughed at the rocks bitter hate
So the earth the brook ran over
Shook with anger when failed to hide
For the brook washed away their identity
But who can unshaped true pride
Soon the quiet valley trembled
And then began the flood
And in but just a moment
The valley changed to mud

A Tribute to my Teenage Bedroom

Heavenly Father bless this room
When I come in sorrow or in gloom
Let it be the kind of place
Where I can come and hide my face
Help me find great happiness here
When nobody else wants me near
Let all my walls be plastered down
With posters and pictures that are profound
And when it's time for me to sleep
It's these four walls that hear we weep
'Cause when I lose love and start feeling bad
I come to this room insanely mad
It's just because it's peaceful in here
And all my troubles disappear
Oh can't you see I love my room
So let it be my living tomb

3rd Poem, Written in 9th Grade 

My Love

My love for you
   is greater
than an ocean
   or a sea
It's a sunset
   in the evening
with a soft, warm,
   summer breeze
It may not strike
   like lightening
but you will know
   it's there
It's just soft
   because you're special
and warm because
   I care

The Pure in Heart

They say the valley's beautiful, the flowers glow like stars
The streets are layed with golden stones and the angels play their harps
Most of us strive on going there because we want the best
We forget to ponder sincerity when we work towards our quest
If the angels at the holy door say you're welcome, come inside
Will your heart be humbled with a tear or caught up in pride
Will you search for your great mansion you surely felt you earned
Or will your heart be true and pure and have a honest yearn
Will you run straight to your father who will be there with his son
Will you put your arms around them and give thanks for what they've done
You'd learn then why the flowers glow, why the rivers are so pure
Why the valley is so beautiful is because our God dwells there
And he'll put his arms around you and say you're welcome by my side
For no one enters heaven if their only cause is pride

Written Fall 1978

A Tribute to Thanksgiving (at my house!)

Thanksgiving's always wonderful, there's tons of stuff to eat
Mom has a mental breakdown from cooking all that week
Dad eats up half the turkey, then shares the rest with us
My brothers belch with dignity, much to my disgust
And I in all my glory bring out my pumpkin pies
And try to guard from vultures and beady greedy eyes
Baby love the smashed potatoes, not that they're great to eat
But he loves the way they feel between his toes and feet
We stuff our guts capacity, and growl and snarff and munch
And then remind "Dear Mother" dishes are always hers at lunch!

 

Written October 1979
To Mom, Gladys S. Wayment (and her clan!)

Thanks

For the winds that bring the springtime near
  with the newborn baby's cry
For the flowers that will bloom once more
  underneath the big blue sky

For the summer that brings warmth to all
  for the trees and birds and streams
For the friends and love and happiness
  for just feeling all these things

For the cool that beckons fall to come
  for the food we harvest now
For the dancing, singing, and joyfulness
  for the hard work of the plow

For the snow that makes the earth a cloud
  of purity and wonder
For the warmth we share within our hears
  with the power of great thunder

For the blessings we forget to see
  for granted they are taken
For all these things we let go by
  that should not be forsaken

For children's laughter, mothers' smiles
  for love for one another
For the light you've brought into our lives
  we thank thee Heavenly Father!

Written Thanksgiving 1979
To he who blesses us so much. Thankfulness is the most sincere way of showing God we know he is truly a caring and loving father.